top of page

Self care after heartbreak

Relationship breakup can be very painful. It hurts in ways that one cannot describe.

There can be so much anger inside towards the other person and sometimes towards self.

It can affect one in different ways-

- self doubt

- loneliness

- low mood

- anxiety

- feeling guilty

- feeling of emptiness

- difficulty concentrating

But remember, the pain after a breakup is as severe as the pain after losing a loved one and it's going to take some time.

It takes time to heal.

In the rush to forget someone and move on, one might take decisions that are helpful in the short run but might yield in unhealthy results in the long run.

Here are some things to remember and practice that can help you cope up with the pain-

  • If you are still in contact, limit the conversations and the information shared.

  • Control the urge to stalk them as it hinders in the process of acceptance.

  • If you still remember them, it's natural. Avoid spending a lot of time on these memories when they pop up in the mind.

  • If you have any belongings that constantly remind you of them, you can keep them away in a safe place.

There is no option to erase memories but there is an option to accept the memories.
  • Even if you don't feel like doing other things, try to do at least your daily chores.

  • If you haven't got a closure, try writing a letter to them writing everything that you wish to say (but the letter remains with you)

  • Every time there is a 'What if" in the mind, just PAUSE, BREATHE and remind yourself 'Things have happened and I did what I could in that moment.'

  • Make a list of things that you have always wanted to and see if you could start with a few things now.

It's natural to have these feelings and they won't last forever.
  • Try not to rush yourself into another relationship. It doesn't really help to forget someone.

  • Reflect on what you have learned from the incident.

  • Do not isolate yourself. Instead, try to stay in touch with your close ones.

  • Prioritise yourself and your needs.

  • Find one thing that will help you feel in control.

Remember, with time the intensity with which these memories affect you will only decrease.

If you are finding it difficult to go through your day to day life or are having self harming thoughts, talk to a mental health professional. You can book a session at

88 views1 comment

Recent Posts

See All

बीमार सिकंदर....

मैंने देखा, एक सिकंदर चेहरा था, चेहरे के अंदर परत-परत थे, ओढ़े सारे कोई और था, पैर पसारे जग उसने, सारा ही जीता लेकिन, तन्हा ही वो जीता लोग सभी, उससे घबराते पर, वो जागे सारी रातें बैचैनी, उसके सर डोले ब

Am I a good person?

As I sit in front of the screen Sinking slowly into my thoughts I hear a voice from within That asks me, "Am I a good person?" I try to think- Maybe I am But it feels like a scam Wouldn't I feel happy


Anushree Chatterjee
Anushree Chatterjee

Very helpful article.

bottom of page